The Three Stooges phenomenon was coughing through its last few drops of cultural fuel when I was a kid — I remember their shorts airing on afternoon TV, between Gilligan’s Island reruns and episodes of Woody Woodpecker — which is why, I guess, people were willing to cut the Farrelly brothers a nice check to update the Stooges’ timeless blend of infantile humor and flawless physical comedy for the 21st century.

It makes sense, is what I’m saying, but it’s still a patently awful idea, especially when the Stooges’ classic films are readily available at very reasonable prices. Seriously, if you think your kids will enjoy the Stooges, just pony up a few extra dollars for one of the many DVD box sets for sale at that Amazon link back there. You’ll get a lot more film for your buck, and none of it will make you nauseous with dread, which is how I felt sitting through the Farrellys’ latest (and, God willing, last) trailer for their exceedingly ill-advised Stooges reboot.

Well, don’t say I didn’t warn you, but watch if you must. And while you’re watching, ask yourself whether it wouldn’t have been a cheaper, easier, and all-around better idea to simply remaster some of the original classics and reissue them. Now that would be a film that dads could happily take their kids to see. This? This is just garbage.