Just. No.
First off – Yes they made a sequel to Chihuahua. Secondly, there was a first Chihuahua movie?
Listen, I was not going to watch this movie. Ever. It’s a direct to DVD, cheaply made knock off of Beverly Hills Chihuahua which is terrible in it’s own right. Somewhere, somebody thought this was a good idea.
We didn’t.
Luckily for you, I have entertaining friends. Whom I bribed to review it via Twitter. So, they put their kids to bed, grabbed a bottle of bourbon and, well………
Alright. Chihuahua Too. Here we go.
— Rubie Q (@Rubie_Q) August 9, 2013
The kids may have just found Narnia. Or a wine cellar. Or a snuff room.
— Rubie Q (@Rubie_Q) August 9, 2013
Why are moms in these straight to video movies always wearing khaki capris from Dress Barn that are three sizes too big?
— Mrs. Q (@notachance72) August 9, 2013
The premise here is that the chihuahua was a vaudeville star who’s now haunting her old home. I think. Maybe? I’m drunj.
— Rubie Q (@Rubie_Q) August 9, 2013
Weird foreplay between live Golden Retriever and Dead Chihuahua. This is getting weird.
— Mrs. Q (@notachance72) August 9, 2013
Uh oh, now live Retriever and Dead Chihuahua are going to have fun sexy pool time.
— Mrs. Q (@notachance72) August 9, 2013
I think the dogs wrote the script too.
— Rubie Q (@Rubie_Q) August 9, 2013
The little girl’s hair in every scene of this movie is a different length. How hard is it to maintain continuity?
— Mrs. Q (@notachance72) August 9, 2013
Real scene–Mom: I’m craving a Twinkie *suggestive look* Dad: Great. Now I want a Ding Dong.
— Mrs. Q (@notachance72) August 9, 2013
I hope they fed these dogs like all the hot dogs and cheese they wanted because this is animal cruelty otherwise.
— Rubie Q (@Rubie_Q) August 9, 2013
The big reveal: Ghost Dog is haunting the house because she’s waiting for her owners to come home. Her owners died … on the Titanic.
— Rubie Q (@Rubie_Q) August 9, 2013
Why haven’t you taught your 10 yr old to swim when you live in a house with a pool? You are a terrible mother!
— Mrs. Q (@notachance72) August 9, 2013
What do you feed a Ghost Dog?
— Rubie Q (@Rubie_Q) August 9, 2013
Worried because now I am seriously interested in knowing what happened in the first Chihuahua movie.
— Mrs. Q (@notachance72) August 9, 2013
Ghost Dog is living with Family now. Because apparently she will never find rest and is shackled to this house eternally. So. That’s nice.
— Rubie Q (@Rubie_Q) August 9, 2013
Honestly, I don’t demand much in my child’s entertainment, but this is too junky. Like the cotton candy of movies. No nutritional value.
— Mrs. Q (@notachance72) August 9, 2013
Oh, Chihuahua Too. How cute that you thought you needed an anti-piracy notice at the end.
— Rubie Q (@Rubie_Q) August 9, 2013
So, there you go. We just saved you 80 minutes of your life. Rubie & Mrs Q had plenty of other tweets about the movie. Make sure to check out their timelines for more.